> LOADING CANINE ARTIFACT DATA...
> SCAN COMPLETE
> HUMOR PROTOCOL: ACTIVATED

ITEM CLASSIFICATION: Canine Superiority Statement Tee
HUMOR PROTOCOL: "My Dog Is Uglier Than Yours" - Because ugly dogs are the best dogs
COMPATIBILITY: Dog lovers with superior taste in imperfect pups
LOGO STATUS: WeirdToo dog jock insignia embedded

TECHNICAL SPECIFICATIONS:
• Material Composition: 100% cotton (comfort protocols engaged)
• Size Range: S-5XL (accommodates all human variants)
• Durability Matrix: Shoulder tape reinforcement active
• Collar Type: Ribbed knit (shape retention subroutines)
• Production Ethics: Verified ethical sourcing
• Shipping Protocol: FREE (USA territories)
• Customization Subroutines: Available for business branding

MAINTENANCE PROTOCOLS:
• Wash Cycle: Cold water only (max 30°C/90°F)
• Dry Setting: Low heat tumble
• Iron Status: DISABLED
• Bleach: Non-chlorine variants only
• Dry Clean: NOT RECOMMENDED

WARNING: May cause spontaneous dog park conversations, increased confidence in your ugly dog's superiority, and attraction of fellow weird dog parents.

ERROR 404: Perfect dogs not found. Ugly dogs are where it's at.

> END TRANSMISSION
> READY FOR DEPLOYMENT